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Wednesday, September 12th, 2012
2:41 pm - Improv Auditons
Hey All!

Atlas Improv Company holds its fall open auditions this Saturday and Sunday at 1PM. Come to either. No experience necessary. You can come just to see what all the fuss is about.

This is a special audition because in addition to looking for new company members, we will also be casting our once-every-2-years show, THE CUT. I did the cut in it's first year, and it was an amazing experience.

Here's a link to a video about it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyRCZ7f-Txk

Hope to see you there.

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Sunday, September 23rd, 2007
3:41 pm - An old letter I found
Here's an e-mail I sent an old friend of mine. Hello, you. Remember this? I just found it cleaning up my e-mail and don't remember sending it. I cut the first and last parts where I gushed teen angst.



"I was just thinking about moving out and realized what weird roommates we'd make. We'd have a spotless house, but spend an unhealthy amount of time in front of the playstation2. I'm afraid of the fights we'd have over the internet connection... or the food.
After week two I think we'd both be sick of eggs, mac&cheese, Hotpockets, and ice cream.

I'd have to learn to cook.. And of course, knowing you, you'd get all upset with me stealing your gender role, so you'd prolly overcompensate by washing all our clothes and cleaning my room... in which you'll find condoms.. WHICH my possession of will upset you, because, of course, you're trying to fit (unnaturally) into the gender role of a crazy person.. er.. female.

When I finally get DONE with my cooking course I'll come home to realize how gay cooking makes me look... SOOOO I'll go get a tattoo of something manly... which'll probably be a big black penis on my neck.... course when it's done I'll realize how gay THAT makes me and I'll come home determined to HAVE YOU (in the Biblical sense) to prove my masculinity.. which wont go over well due to the fact that you'll be playing Hard To Get because you feel it's the girly thing to do (which obviously isn't to say “no”.. obviously, obviously) So after hours of my attempts at courtship you will sigh and faint (girly things) in which weakness I will have you... but it wont go well considering I'll have a giant black penis on my neck to remind me that I'm probably gay and into black men with penis tattoos... SOOOO. after I've had you... a couple times... just to be sure...I'll go have a milkshake... a chocolate milkshake ::wink:: then I'll take a nap on the couch...(yep, you guessed it) leaving the glass on the Playstation 2.. which will spill, cause an electrical fire (see where this is going?) and start to burn down the house.(do ya?)

Basically, the smoke will flow right into your room (where you'll be laying out tomorrow's corset) and remind you of a smell you've smelled before... the smell of a biker chick. Course now you'll come to the conclusion you are and always have been gay and have a sudden urge to buy a truck. Fuck cooking! You want a truck! On your way out, you'll see me crying, unconscious (yes you can cry while unconscious) and you'll carry be to safety... safety being your heart... because your heart is the safest and most beautiful place in the world."

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Friday, November 17th, 2006
1:34 am
I have a rare blood type, so the Red Cross hounds me every time their chart says I’m filled again. This time I called them before hand. The woman, recognizing my voice and surprised by my early call, wondered if I was calling someone back. So she asked, “You didn’t speak with anyone, did you?”

But I thought she said, “You didn’t sleep with anyone, did you?” which when spoken by a blood bank could mean something like, “We just found out you have AIDS.”

To my immediate response, “What does this have to do with my sex life?” she said, “Nothing.”

This was followed by several moments of awkward silence.

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1:28 am
Reflecting on childhood is almost depressing. It’s too bad our lives don’t end that way.

Every day, as soon as the sun was out, I would run out my back screen door and to my neighbor's yard. I’d knock on his sliding-glass back door, he'd emerge, we'd run to the next yard where two girls lived. Together we played through all kinds of adventures. We were superheroes, scientists, pirates, cowboys, explorers of the Congo, acting out Narnia, Jurassic Park, and Invitation to the Game.

Everything was green, our yards were enormous, days went on forever. There were never complications and there was never consequence.

Side note: Our parents actually read Jurassic Park to us long before it was made into a movie.

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Wednesday, October 11th, 2006
12:18 am
I sleep at memorial library all the time – right at the tables outside the actual library. I wonder if people think that’s weird. I see people sleeping there, though, usually unintentionally.

I usually study for an hour or so… but then it just feels so good to let yourself be taken over my sleep. Giving in is a pleasurable experience. Waking up with your arm asleep and your legs numb is less so, I suppose.

Today I sat across from a girl, studied for a ½ hour and then fell into a 30 minute nap. When I awoke, though, I immediately started studying again. I probably looked like a homeless student.

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Wednesday, September 6th, 2006
11:16 am
damn

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Wednesday, June 28th, 2006
11:29 pm
When I was growing up there was a time when I had good friends. We were all extremely close, we loved each other. We hugged, we danced together, we would spend all day during the summer in someone's empty house drinking Pepsi and eating pizza. Grand times those were.

I have good friends now, but it's not the same.

I miss being close enough to someone to touch them. I hug my friends now, but would feel awkward lifting any one of them off of the couch to dance. I don't lean on them when I'm tired... is it odd to miss doing that?

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Wednesday, May 10th, 2006
10:26 pm - Contra 3 SNES
I’m looking to borrow someone’s Contra 3: The Alien Wars for Super Nintendo. My buddy and I have beaten all the other ones and don’t want to drop the $18 some on ebay for a copy.

Anyone own it and willing to lend or sell it?
Thanks,
Bryan

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Sunday, May 7th, 2006
1:03 am
I used to make up stories for a girl named Valerie Kasmar when we worked at Logli’s supermarkets. It was the summer, I was 16, and I would create stories to entertain her while we worked boring 9-5 shifts at the checkout line. I actually don’t remember doing this, but she told me today that she remembers a lot of the stories, especially one about a giant carrot (beats me). I used to do the same for my brother when we were kids.

Feels like forever ago.

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Wednesday, May 3rd, 2006
9:41 pm
I'm sick and irritable.

But duty calls. Work work work.

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Tuesday, April 18th, 2006
12:07 am
Reading about the new DaVinci Code movie, I stumbled on this imdb.com post:

“The lack of disrespect to a people's faith and to the most benign entity in the world is outrageous. This Mr. Brown might write quite beautifully, few people are true artists, yet that does not give him the right to do what he did.”

Why are people such sensitive idiots? Isn’t anyone else tired of this, “you don’t have the right to offend me or my faith” craptrash? Remember the Enlightenment? I have every right to publish whatever perverse, insensitive, blasphemous, ignorant trash I desire. If I want to draw a picture of Buddha tea-bagging a holy cow, I can. And the Catholic Church is a benign entity? It started numerous holy wars, caused political upheavals and attacks homosexuals with a far great ferocity than the DaVinci Code attacks Christian faith.

I absolutely hated The DaVinci Code and was pissed I was conned into reading it. However, I understand if reading the DaVinci Code is one of your guilty pleasures, not unlike enjoying the first two Mummy movies, in which case it’s fine. Sometimes you’re in the mood for a cheap ride.

But the whole world has fallen in love with Dan Brown’s amateur mystery novel. Someone on imdb actually called Brown a genius. A genius? The book is painfully predictable, shallow and CARDBOARD. Characters take turns stepping into the spotlight to ramble on about Templar history, returning focus to alternate characters only to prevent a 300-some page monologue. It reads like a Goosebumps book – every chapter is a cliffhanger and chapters are literally 3 to 4 pages long.

So why do people really like it? Well for one, people can’t read, so when they find something they can easily digest, hey it’s art! Secondly, because Brown did some controversial research that supports people’s “the Catholic Church lies so maybe everyone’s right about religion” bullshit that they believed before reading the book anyway. Newsflash! Brown’s research is manipulated to fit his story. Also, you could get the same effect just calling yourself Protestant, no harm done.

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Monday, March 27th, 2006
1:03 am
I wrote Media Matters today with a request that they remove a fallacy from their web site. I have a feeling that I will never hear back from them... hopefully because the never read my e-mail and not because they think gaps in logic are acceptable.

Then I trolled some Media Matters members' comments on various stories... just people fighting and committing fallacy after fallacy. They generally go like this:

"[name] said, [original post text]
Dear [name],

WOW, just wow.
So, [Straw Man fallacy], [Circumstantial Ad Hominem],[Inconsistency Ad Hominem].
Why don't you just go to hell, [name]"


sometimes, they use false dilemma, too.

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Sunday, March 19th, 2006
3:54 am - It was a good night.
Tonight I made an audience member laugh so hard he shot slurpee through his nose.

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Friday, February 17th, 2006
12:28 am
As I read “Reason in Communication” – a logic and rhetoric textbook – I can’t help but shake my head at what simple concepts the previous owner chose to highlight. The book is 78% indigo pink now, with a few prepositional phrases scattered about unmarked.

To be fair, though, I often highlight pleasing syntax when I come across it.

So either she’s an idiot or has bad taste in sentence structure.

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Tuesday, February 14th, 2006
12:37 am
Things are going well for me.
Except.
Half of my Spanish class are members of a Fraternity of a Sorority. So just about everyone thinks it’s hilarious to add “o” to several English words instead of attempting to actually speak in Spanish. They're also constantly telling the same story: “Person A got wasted, as did person B, and man… you shoulda seen person C.” the story always ends with someone waking up on a stranger’s couch. They look at me like I’m an alien because I would rather read the new york times before class than talk to “buddy” about the underage drinking charges he just got dropped. Then again, I bet I look pretentious as fuck reading the new york times before Spanish class.

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Saturday, February 4th, 2006
5:53 pm
I honestly haven’t gotten a good night of sleep in months. I either lie in bed awake for long stretches of time or continually wake up. Or, I simply stay out far too late and leave myself only a few hours to sleep.

I’ve got shows in an hour; I need to get moving.

The Wisconsin Newspaper Association meeting this year sucked, hard. It was lecture after lecture of the same “newspapers are dying” drivel followed by the “we’ve got to conquer the lazy American youth through the internet”” calls to action. Honestly, you’d think they discovered the internet in 2005. When a speaker told us that he allows his staff to write blogs (this includes personal blogs unrelated to work) only under the conditions that they drive young readers to the newspaper’s site, use clean langauge and state no opinions, I asked: “If they can’t have an opinion, and if they aren’t allowed to talk about the things they’re covering and are obviously most knowledgeable about, why would I ever want to read one of your blogs? It sounds incredibly boring.” He didn’t have an answer.

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Monday, January 9th, 2006
10:21 pm
I just finished The Time Traveler's Wife. I found a lot about the book that I didn't like and yet I still enjoyed it.

I am too easily suckered in to the emotions of the characters, though.

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Saturday, January 7th, 2006
10:33 am
My friends and I went out last night for my birthday; it was a good, good time.

thanks for everyone that came out and also to those who called-in happy birthdays.

If only I didn't have to work now...

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Thursday, January 5th, 2006
8:26 pm
I received my letter of acceptance to the UW-Madison School of Journalism and Mass Communication today, on my birthday. A record number to students applied this year, so I'm feeling really good.

Thanks for the birthday wishes, everyone.

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2:38 am
ThpethalK: i am so drunk
monologued: me too
ThpethalK: we are totally journalists
ThpethalK: and it's fantaztic
ThpethalK: we should get married
monologued: journalists all drink way too much
monologued: at all the conventions they all admit to it
ThpethalK: and smoke affectedly
ThpethalK: when stressed
ThpethalK: I KNOW
monologued: journalists die horrible deaths because the stress is too much
monologued: they have bad marriages
ThpethalK: that's why journalists
ThpethalK: should marie other journalists
ThpethalK: because they understand
monologued: right
monologued: lets get married
monologued: right now
ThpethalK: ok
monologued: I do
ThpethalK: I do
ThpethalK: *kiss*
monologued: *kiss*
ThpethalK: Yay!

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